Stuff

First of all, the long hair is g-o-n-e! Kimberlee's mommy has a salon and gave Mia the cutie cut.









After the hair cut we went out to dinner to celebrate my mother's birthday. Mia LOVED the ice cream with yummy chocolate syrup.







The following are just some shots from Mia and her big sissy playing in the car waiting for brother's soccer practice to end.









AND...I need some help. A week ago Mia was in the Vietnamese Children's Choir. Her sissy made a video on her camera. I uploaded the video. It's a .AVI and I don't know how to compress it. I have a Mac. I've tried to upload it to YouTube, no go, I've tried to drop it into DropShots, no go. Does anyone know how to do this. I'd love to share it! It's really adorable!!!

The Many Faces of Mia ~ Photo Heavy

On Thursday night, I was watching Rush Hour (for the 900th time) and Mia brought me her sister's camera, climbed in my lap, and wanted me to take pictures of her. (A model to be I tell you!!!) So, here's what I took. Enjoy!

Little Southern Comforts (no not the drink)

I do believe my Mia is officially a Southern Gal! I had my suspicions that she'd acclimate to our Southern charm with no problems when we first brought her home and she pronounced Elmo as Ahl-moe. Her latest thing now is the word "honey" in addressing someone. If she wants you to come to where she is she'll say, "come here honey", or "oh, honey! what's matter?". One of my favorites is if something breaks or she sees someone fall down she says "Oh, dear, oh dear!" She also has the deep sigh of exasperation down pat, along with the slow upward eyeroll.

We've been having conversations (as best as you can with a three-year-old) about dolls lately. I personally cannot stand the Bratz doll and I think they are the truly a horrid example of what our culture is trying to force on our little girls. Anyway, I won't get into that now... But, Mia continually says, "mommy don't like Bratz" and I don't know, maybe she's heard me say it at sometime but she then follows it up with, "it just reh-dik-a-lus" (ridiculous) in her slow drawn out Southern accent. It's one of the funniest things I've ever heard.

Here's some pics taken this past year of my little Southern Gal.




(Trying to figure out how to do the "church and the steeple"

New and not-so-improved Mia

Mia has had a coming into her own since she's started pre-school. I must say that overall it has been a wonderful experience with some very minor and completely normal attachment issues that quickly resolved as she became used to the new routine.

To give a quick setup so you can follow along, the children in her pre-school class are given a ranking Green or Yellow or Red each day. If the child "stays on Green" by the end of the day they can choose two prizes when its time to leave, Yellow one prize, and Red no prize. Mia has "been on Green" every day of preschool, until this week.

Monday, Mia was put on Yellow. She refused to obey the teachers when it was time to leave the playground. When it was time to line up to go in, Mia ran the other direction and absolutely refused to line up to go back inside. The teachers had to start taking the children in before Mia decided to go too. (Just a note, the teachers weren't going to leave her out there. They were hoping by her seeing that the other kids were leaving that it would prompt her to get into the line too. It worked.) Because of her willful disobedience she only got to choose one prize at the end of the day.

Tuesday, she escalated to Red. Not only did she refuse to do what was asked of her after the frequent requests to do as the rest of the class was doing, but she took it further on the playground. Another little girl was minding her own business and playing in a toddler car and Mia decided it was her turn. Mia physically pushed the little girl not only out of the car but also kept pushing until the little girl was down on the ground. It ended in the little girl screaming and crying so hard that she couldn't tell the teachers exactly how badly she was hurt. The 'funny' thing was that when the teachers asked Mia what she'd done she just stood there stone faced. Kimberlee witnessed it too, but refused to talk until she got home and tried to tell her mommy, "Mia push down, hurt her and her cry".

Well, today, she did alright. She stayed on Green but the teachers reported that she refused to play with anyone, and even yelled at Kimberlee when Kimberlee tried to play with her. Her teachers also said that Mia has decided that being Line-leader is a joke and too short in comparison to being Bible Helper. Mia has figured out that Line-leader only last a few short moments, no one really pays any attention to the Line-leader, and it's just not all that fun or important. But Bible Helper is longer and has more duties. As Bible Helper she gets to hold the Bible up before the class as the teacher tells the story, gets to lead the class in song, and recite the Bible verse. Mia is ALL about being in front of the class and doing whatever the teacher is doing. (When I take her to the library she picks out a book, climbs to the top of the little stage area, and "reads" the book from the stage to, who I can only guess, are imaginary listeners seated below the stage.)

I'm so taken back by all this. Mia was the quiet child. Yeah, she could be stubborn at home at times but out in public, or in a group, she was so compliant, quiet, and sweet. Not anymore. She is standing up for herself, being assertive, and figuring out what things she likes and doesn't like. That's a great thing, as long as she doesn't harm other kids and she does what the teachers ask of her.

Her biggest struggle at school, since she's begun, is sharing. Here at home she really doesn't have to worry about sharing since her siblings are so much older. When she has friends over, she plays great. When she's at Kimberlee's house she does okay (sometimes there are some spats). But at school the closest to sharing that she gets is maybe allowing another child (unless its Kimberlee who apparently has special privileges) to sit near her with their own toy. It's even gotten so bad now that yesterday her Daddy was kidding with her and asked her to share some of her goldfish crackers with him. She threw the bowl down and started pitching a fit ~ and he was just playing with her.

I know the majority of this is that she is three-years-old. That alone explains a great deal of it. But, I also think that she's a little confused. At the orphanage, they had no toys, nothing to claim as their own. When they did get some thing they guarded it profusely, until ultimately it was taken to never be seen again. Now, here at home, she doesn't have anything that she needs to share. Every toy here is hers. When other kids come over, she knows the toys her friends are playing with are hers and aren't going anywhere. She's comfortable with that. At Kimberlee's house she knows she's at Kimberlee's and everything there is for Kimberlee just like the things at Mia's home are for Mia. The same when she goes to other friends homes. But, at the pre-school, I can't help but wonder if it's the orphanage thing again. I'm not sure she understands that the toys there belong to the school and not any one child. I don't know, just a speculation.

My concern is how to make sure she does not turn into a full-blown brat. I don't want to feed into this behavior. I've talked with D who keeps her on Thursdays. She's going to try to make some sharing scenarios with Mia. Since the behavior really only happens during pre-school, I'm not too sure how to be a part of the fix.

Any suggestions...

One Year Ago Today...

The Day We Met November 2005

One year ago today, I boarded a plane to Vietnam to finally bring home my baby girl. After what seemed to take an eternity filled with crying, praying, obsessing and crying, praying, and obsessing some more, the day finally came. I had stayed up all night (purposefully) packing. And, I believe I also called Nicole in a total panic/freak-out wondering what the heck it was that I was about to do.

My husband drove me (actually I drove, he rode then drove himself back) and my friend D to the airport in Atlanta. He dropped us off in a car line and headed straight back home. For those of you that know my husband, he's NEVER sick. That day he was running a terrible fever and actually stopped at the Georgia Welcome Center to get some Motrin out of a vending machine. D and I went from Atlanta to LA, then from LA to Hanoi. I actually slept ~ HARD ~ thanks to staying awake over 24 hours and I believe pure emotional exhaustion.

On the long flight I remember waking up and thinking that I couldn't believe that I was actually on a plane going back to get the little girl I'd met almost a year previously. It truly didn't feel real.

Once in Hanoi, we met up with our facilitator's wife, who would be our travel companion, as well as another agency representative and the other two adoptive families in our group. From Hanoi we flew directly to DaNang. Thirty-six hours from my door-step to DaNang. We went straight from the DaNang airport to the orphanage. (against the pleading to get to the hotel first and shower!)

When we arrived at the orphanage, I was overwhelmed. So overwhelmed that I recognized all the toddlers EXCEPT my own! I even walked over to her crib, where she was asleep with her thumb in her mouth, and said, "No, that's not her. Where's my kid?"

I recognized Trang, now known as Kimberlee, and went to her to love on her for a minute. Then a nanny came in and pointed to my sleeping angel, who I hadn't recognized. The nanny reached in and woke her up. Mistake number one. This set the tone for the rest of the day.

She started crying and clinging to her nanny. Her nanny handed her to me and, for a brief couple of minutes, I was able to hold her. I even went out to the swing, where I had first held my precious baby the previous year, and rocked her. She wasn't sure what was going on. The nannies were telling her that I was her Ma and it was starting to completely freak her out.

She had witnessed other kids' Ma come for them. Her best friend, Huong (Nicole's daughter) had a terrible time when her Ma came. So much so that Mia hit Nicole in defence of her friend. While on the swing with me a nanny walked by and the screaming started, and didn't end.

Another toddler was being adopted as well. That child too was scared and bewildered. The nannies did the unthinkable and shut these two confused and terrified children off from them in a separate room leaving them with us ~ the object of their fear. We couldn't calm them down.

Eventually the nannies came out and we tried to mingle and play with the other children, hoping that our girls would see that we were safe and not a threat to them. No go. After thirty-six hours on a plane and finally again seeing the little girl I loved, this was not good. It was hard. It sucked.

When we finally got to the hotel we were told that the G&R would be the next morning. Great. Well... It was decided that the toddlers should have another chance to meet with us since the first meeting was so hard. So, the G&R was postponed until later in the afternoon.

The next day we went back to the orphanage. My daughter saw me and bolted. We stayed for a few hours, and made some small headways, very small. I was able to hold her a couple times. I usually had to bribe her with sips from a water bottle. She did like D however, and STILL loves her! We left the G&R clothes there and returned to the hotel. A couple hours later, we arrived at a non-descript government building. We walked into a tiny little room, and there awaiting us were the babies, a wonderful orphanage worker, the director, and some officials.

I tried to sit across the table from Mia, but she refused to look up. If she caught a glimpse of me, the tears started again. I walked over to her and put a pearl necklace I'd bought her around her neck, and a hat on her that matched her outfit. I could tell she liked the necklace and I caught her sneaking glimpses at it and trying to feel it without letting on that she was touching it.

After I signed all the paperwork, while Mia was still on her nannies lap, it came time to take the official pictures of me receiving Mia. Mia WASN'T having it! Oh, the screaming!

Finally after all three of the families in our group had completed the pomp and circumstance it came time to leave. Lan, her wonderful nanny, held Mia all the way to the van while doing a not-so-good job of fighting tears. I understand her heart and I'm grateful for her, but it really really didn't help for Mia to see her beloved nanny crying too. I got Mia, hugged Lan, and headed for the van. The other little toddler girl was screaming so much that I think Mia just shut down. Once in the van, Mia cried, but it was a silent tears streaming crying. I think the shock took over right then.

We headed straight for the hotel, I think. Maybe we went to get formula. After this, it's blurry. I believe I was in some sort of shock too. I do remember that when we did get back to the hotel that I immediately bathed Mia in the sink. She was so stunned to see her reflection that she didn't even whimper. I laid down with her on the bed and we knocked out. I think D must have put her in the crib. I truly just can't remember anything other than being emotionally exhausted.

But, for all the heartache and joys in Vietnam, this little angel was finally MINE ~ Mia (Italian, meaning 'mine')

We have come so far in one year. It is hard to believe how this little girl that is attached at my hip didn't want anything to do with me. This little girl, who wore rags can't get enough of "princess" dresses. This little girl who spoke another language counts in English and Spanish now. This little girl who refused to look up now insists that you look at her while she's talking to you. This little girl who sat in a corner of a hotel room, shoulders slumped, not saying a peep now puts on a tiara and a tutu and dances and sings at the top of her lungs. This little girl who didn't let me hear her laugh even a little for at least six weeks after we'd been home now can't wait to get mommy tickles and actually snorts when she belly-laughs. This little girl who kicked at me and refused any kindness I'd show her now hangs on my neck and says, "I love you Mommy!" and "Mommy always comes back." ~ That's right baby girl! When I met you adption wasn't open, but I came back. I'll always come back!

She has been, and is, worth all the long agonizing waiting, the heartbreak of a child who initially rejected me, the fear I've felt of the unknown, the medical issues, the language barrier, all of it. She's worth it. B found the song by Tracy Chapman that I have on the sidebar that I've dedicated to Mia. It's hard to believe that a year has gone by, but she waited for me and I returned for her, just like the song says, and just like my Little Miss Mia says, "mommy always comes back".

It's Official!

Mia is now a full fledged pre-schooler! (see previous post below!) The first day, Mia was fine and Kim was fine. Not a tear in sight (except for me fighting tears while pacing in the school hallway for an hour). As soon as we walked in Mia went straight to the books and wanted to read a story. I convinced her to put the book down and hang up her backpack. She hung it under her cubby hole. Then, she went to start making an ABC necklace with Kim and a couple boys at a table. She could have cared less that I left!

When I picked her up she looked so grown up with her little backpack on her back. She talked my ears off the whole way home. "Mia school fun!"

Day two, the same thing, though this time when I came to get her the teacher said she cried a little bit, but that Kim was coming to her to comfort her. It was so sweet! Kim didn't shed a tear.
Day three, Mia went to D~'s house like her usual Thursday routine. Kim's mom called me to say that Kim was screaming at the preschool for Mia and that she was having a complete meltdown that Mia wasn't there. She was fine though after her mommy left.

All Mia has been talking about is school. It's really cute!

Mia has already picked up new songs and a couple of new words. Unfortunately, I learned on the first night that Mia had also picked up fit pitching. Yes, she already could throw some doozies but this was a whole new scream. Kim's mommy called me about 10 o'clock that same night reporting the same phenomenon with Miss Kim. But, night two wasn't bad, so if that's the worst, I can handle it.

She looks so disgusted because she wanted to run into the school and I made her stop so I could take a picture.



The next two pics are her in the reading zone wanting to immediately start reading stories with her new teacher.





Making an ABC necklace with Kim and new friends.


Miss Kim ready to play


Mia & Kim at the end of the first day

Happy Birthday Miss Mia (and a REALLY BIG step!)

Well today Little-Miss-Mia turned 3! I can't believe it. We've been telling her that her birthday was coming, but she had no clue what we were talking about. She caught on pretty quickly today when everywhere she went she was getting gifts. Her first surprise of the day (and mine too!) was from Mia's big sister H. When I was in the shower, H got Mia dressed for me. I'd ironed her clothes and laid them out on the bed. When I got out of the shower, Mia had on the cutest little birthday dress that I'd been admiring at my friend's baby boutique. H works there and she got the dress and surprised me and Mia with it. It was a little too big, but we found a blouse that worked great under it.

Mia in her new birthday cupcake dress from Sissy

Next we met up with Mia's best bud Kim (I'll tell more about that in a minute). Kim gave Mia a Dora jewelry box filled with necklaces and bracelets. Too cute!

Then, we were off to have our birthday lunch (it's my birthday too!) with D~, Mia's most favoritist person in the whole wide world. D~ traveled with me to VN to adopt Mia. I've asked her to be Mia's godmother. Mia spends one day a week with D~. Anyway, D~ treated us to lunch at a nice restaurant. D~ and her daughter B~ (who happens to be the very reason I ever met Mia) presented Mia with some really wonderful gifts. D~ hand made a really sweet scrapbook page which she'd framed. Mia LOVES the whole princess thing. (Disney has her sold!) D~ had taken pictures of Mia in a Tinkerbell costume and placed it on a princess scrapbook page with all of Mia's favorite princesses. She wrote Mia a beautiful little note on the page. It's really meaningful and precious. (Mia's daddy wanted me to hang it in the living room! sigh...) But to Mia, the best of all was a bin of dress-up costumes complete with shoes, jewelry, a blond Cinderella wig (hilarious!), glasses, hats, pom-poms, the works. She opened all this IN the restaurant, and then proceeded to put it all on and dance and prance IN the restaurant. Stupid me didn't think to (hello!?!) bring camera. D~ and B~ took pics that I'll post when I get them. I haven't laughed that hard in, well, I can't remember how long. Mia was so full of herself. It was so funny.



We got home later and I hung her picture from D~ over her bed, near her photo of her and Kim. Above the photo of her and Kim is her VN adoption box. It holds a little teddy bear bought for her from my friend that lives in Hanoi who we visited with often while on our adoption trip. It also holds two bottles of sand from the China Seashore in DaNang. The bottles holding the sand are from the first hotel that I stayed at when I got Mia. I took the bottles and walked to the seashore and filled them with the sand and some small shells. I've kept the resort tags on the bottles. Anyway, since her special stuff is hanging there over her bed I thought it was the best place for her artwork from D~ (sorry Husband, it just wouldn't mean the same in the living room).



So, now to the REALLY BIG step. Here goes...Kim's mommy has been looking for a preschool for Kim. Another friend of mine recommended one very close by. So, I went this morning with Kim's mom to check out the school and give some emotional support to a difficult decision. I met her in the parking lot. As soon as we pulled in, Mia pointed and yelled, "Mia's school!". Okay. For those of you who know me, I'm a homeschool mommy (who utilizes wonderful co-ops) and I really don't advocate preschool unless there's no way around it. I most definitely hadn't mentioned "school" to Mia, or told her what were going to go do other than we'd see Kim. So, I thought that was really strange. So, we go into the school and I absolutely fall in love with the place. We got there while the kids were having Bible study. Mia could not wait to get in. She could barely contain herself waiting to go into the classroom. Well, we get in there and Mia goes over to the table where the kids are starting a craft and tries to take a seat and get started. She and Kim held hands and explored the room and met the teachers and 'chatted' with the other kids. THREE other kids in the class are adopted Asian children, two girls and a boy. The racial mix was awesome and the teachers were awesome. I was totally blown away. I asked an insane amount of questions like teacher ratio, background checks, teacher education, etc. Mia absolutely loved it there, and didn't want to leave. I loved it too. So....I registered Mia and she starts tomorrow.

We went out and bought a backpack and a lunch box. I just can't believe it. But she seems so ready for it. She does great in Sunday school, and I think she'll do really well with this. I'm just going to do part time in the mornings a couple days a week. And, she'll have Kim too. I'm really excited for her, and it's all she's talked about all day.

We'll see how she does (and me too!)

UPDATE !!!
Yea! B~ Just sent me the pictures of Mia dressing up IN the restaurant! (I love the ones with the glasses; she looks like a librarian)








The Cinderella Wig ~ too darn funny!